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My mom bought me a dog because I always talk about getting one. I live alone and I can hardly take care of myself (financially and responsibly) and I’m kind of really scared to have another living being under my care depending on me. But it’s like. Cool, I got a dog. Thanks mom. But also thanks for causing me more financial stress…

I hate people who have no sense of personal space whatsoever. I hope the idiot breathing down my neck in this elevator is reading this.

Dau Voire (via kushandwizdom)

More good vibes here

(via quotelounge)

True Story. I was at Domino’s picking up a pizza for my mom, live updating here via text on how long I’d be when a family of like.. Indonesians or whatever walked in and like, crowded me. Their children were up against my arms and the adults were inches behind me.
I texted my mom complaining about it and wrote “I’m about to scream if these people don’t get the fuck off me.. I hope they’re reading this.”
Note.. They did not move




i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter

This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.

so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh

Wow fuck whoever wants to judge you based on your life decision… NO kids. NO problem. NObody’s business but yours.



standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like “look at this flower. this flower is taller than i am. this flower is winning and i’m losing”

Wow you are not ready to hear about trees.

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